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Prophecy PDF Print E-mail
Swift
Written by Jeff Wagg   

prophecyimageBeing the new year, the so-called psychics are giving their predictions, and showing off how well they did last year. And I got to thinking.. since everything I've seen leads me to believe that I'm every bit as "psychic" as they are, why not make my own predictions? I've read Kreskin's predictions for 2009, and I think I can do better.

 But what method should I use? Crystal ball? Tea leaves? (I'm more of a coffee drinker) Extispicy? (would sushi count?) Aha, I've found the answer. And it is... iTunes. How, you ask? Well, I shall tell you.

I'll load the track "Prophecy Theme" by Brian Eno from the Dune Original Soundtrack. It's an ethereal piece of music, and the iTunes visualizer swirls and sways with lights and trails that randomly appear with changes in the music. If I put myself in the right state of mind, I should be able to interpret these colors as visions of the future. 

Ok, here goes. I feel myself getting lightheaded (I promise it wasn't the mojitos)  Oh.. oh!  So vivid! So clear! I can look into the future and see exactly what will happen. It's going to be a memorable year!

Here's what I've discovered about the coming year. I'll be back in a year to tell you how I did.

A major celebrity couple will break up amidst rumors of infidelity

An earthquake in South America will raise concerns over larger earthquakes in the future

NASA will lose one of its spacecraft

A blockbuster movie, years in the making, will unexpectedly flop at the box office

A major automaker will merge with another

A leading union will strike and picket lines will form with reports of violence

There will be fewer hurricanes hitting the US this year

The Internet will suffer a failure causing speculation of terrorism

President Obama's approval rating will steadily decline throughout the year

A previously unknown species will be found in an unexpected place

Yes, it's true... I saw all that in the visualizer. Notice how precise I've been! I must surely have tapped into some unseen force here.

So let's see what a year brings. Let's see how I fare against the professionals. And feel free to join in! Make your own predictions and put them in the comments of this article. In one year, we'll analyze it all, and see how we did.